At least one of the symptoms must be either persistent sad or "empty" feelings or loss of interest in activities.
Constant sadness
Irritability
Hopelessness
Trouble sleeping
Low energy or fatigue
Feeling worthless or guilty for no reason
Significant weight change
Difficulty concentrating
Loss of interest in favorite activities
Be sure to tell your health care professional if you're experiencing any of these symptoms.
Call a health care professional right away if you or your family member has any of the following symptoms, especially if they are new, worse, or worry you:
Thoughts about suicide or dying
Attempts to commit suicide
New or worse depression
New or worse anxiety
Feeling very agitated or restless
Panic attacks
Trouble sleeping (insomnia)
New or worse irritability
Acting aggressive, being angry or violent
Acting on dangerous impulses
An extreme increase in activity and talking (mania)
Other unusual changes in behavior or mood
For me, because I'm no longer required (by having to go to a job every day) to fit in to our society's definitions of normal, instead, I can allow what used to be the debilitating emotions I felt all too often on top of my general sadness (especially hopelessness, irritability, difficulty concentrating, loss of interest in activities, feeling agitated and restless, being angry, and also some acting on dangerous impulses [though "dangerous" can be defined in many ways], and occasionally an extreme increase in talking or activity) to simply happen without undue concern, knowing they'll pass as I come to an understanding of why I'm feeling the way I am, and then figuring out what to do next to shift my emotions to a better plane.
But this isn't what I want to consider. . . I want to think about how all of these symptoms can be the result of someone who is simply, naturally, reaching out and attempting to make changes to an unbearable lifestyle and how this simple act can be considered an illness by our culture. (And consider this: if our culture teaches us that reaching out to make changes is an illness, then the obverse must be considered healthful----i.e., stasis, doing what's expected, being happy, happy, happy all the time----thus the preponderance of antidepressant prescriptions.) Our culture tells us to take that pill, stop thinking so much, and "Don't worry be happy now."
Change isn't encouraged in our society. Flux is considered an illness. Losing interest in the "familiar" is a symptom of depression. And of course, depression must be treated with antidepressants and, preferably, with talk-therapy, which can be a saving grace if (and this is a big IF) you can find someone who can relate to you and you to him or her.
My being able to make friends with two good therapists saved my life. If it weren't for the last doctor I had (John Bolter), a prescribing psychologist (i.e., in Louisiana a person with a doctorate in psychology can become further certified to prescribe medication to patients, rather like a PA or physician's assistant), and one other therapist (Jim Purcell) back twenty years ago, I might not be here now. I just needed to talk through some issues that were important to me and to have someone really listen to me and assure me they didn't think I was "crazy" for thinking the way I do. And, of course, they provided me with ideas for acting or coping (or at least, they helped me formulate plans of action). Finding a way to act in a constructive way seems to be one of the most pressing needs of a person who's depressed because when you're depressed, you're physically and mentally stuck in a viscous universe that causes you to move more slowly, rather like trying to push your body through mud.
Why did I feel I needed to pay someone to listen to me? Partly it's because our society seems to require such substantiation to deem it "real" and valid. A person must have "qualifications." But it's also the depressed person's way of saving her friends from the pain of listening to the mental machinations of someone who's thickly and painfully sad and stuck.
Not many people want to dwell on how awful things seem. However, it's a quick way to eliminate from your life the folks who only thought they were your friends----talk to them about the way you really feel and think, as a line from an old CSNY song goes, and you "separate the wheat from the chaff."
But right now, I've talked myself right out of this mood and am preparing to take a walk in the redwoods with a local botanist who works with the parks---a "June blooms" walk at Tolowa Dunes to learn the names of some of the local wildflowers.
I'm making that shift from inner to outer, to nature, the source of healing.
